Your Sexual Language – Indulging Fantasies Together

Author: Silva Neves
Time: ~40 minutes


Couples often find a common language for the domestic space and the romantic space. But often they can struggle to create their common language for the sexual space. In the living room, you have probably developed a comfortable language that is polite and equal. Your sexual language doesn’t have to abide by the same rules, you can give up some politeness in order to bring some erotic. This episode will help you develop a shared language with which you can explore each other’s fantasies and desires. Also you will have fun learning to initiate physical intimacy in various different waysYou can do the full episode in one go, or you can take a break in between each exercises. It can be repeated as many times as you want as it takes practice to be fluent in your own sexual language.

Expert’s Perspective

Silva Neves, Psychosexual and Relationship Psychotherapist.

“In my consulting room, I often help couples develop a common sexual language. At first, it can be difficult and awkward to get started. But once the couple gets used to it, it opens up a new world in which they can explore each other’s fantasies and desires. It is meant to be fun, and it is also a deeply intimate process. I see couples struggling with their decreasing sex life, sexual desires plummeting and the erotic disappearing. In my opinion, this is one of the most common difficulties couples face. Having the resource of Pillow to work towards re-kindling their erotic world on a regular basis, at home, can be really beneficial and make a huge difference for couples’ sex life.

Episode Quotes

Now that your physical space is ready, pay attention to the sexual energy that you are going to create together within it. Look at each other’s faces and pay attention to what you notice.. What do you see today about your partner.  How does it feel to look at your partner, in silence, as you breathe deeply together for one minute?

When you are ready, the first of you can start describing your fantasy, like you were telling a story. Remember to pace yourself slowly, and don’t forget to breathe in between sentences.

In your head, create two or three short sexual requests that you want to tell your partner. These requests are NOT to be actioned. It is just for play. Have fun with them, speaking them out with a different tone of voice or style of speaking. You can even laugh about it!

This Intimacy Exercise is great for

  • Creating sexual desire
  • Playing with a sexual language
  • Ideas for initiating sex

Follow Silva

Instagram: @silvanevespsychotherapy
Twitter: @SilvaNeves3

Learn more about Silva in our blog.

What is an Episode?

Each uniquely crafted intimate audio adventure takes you and your partner on a journey of exploration. Simply press play, follow-along together, and let the intimacy exercise nurture your relationship.

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