How to Play with Pillow

Pillow makes nurturing intimacy in your relationship a breeze. It’s kind of like the meditation app Headspace, but for Couples Intimacy.

The experiences we’ve crafted have been inspired by exercises used in tantra workshops, and by sex and relationship therapists.

We’re trying really hard to help couples open up, improve their intimate communication and to be more creative — to ultimately guide you into an even deeper relationship.

“So I follow-along to ideas suggested by voice on my phone, with my partner, and ‘they’ tell you what to do?”

Yeah, you got it.

Each of these exercises is called an episode. Each episode is between 5–25 minutes in length and explore varying aspects of intimacy, but can very simply be broken down into these 2 areas: Emotional Intimacy and Physical Intimacy. For example, Irresistibly Tantalizing is all about slow, deliberate, sensuous touch. Whilst Deeply Gazing will connect you in an entirely different way.


Explore the app with your partner, read some of the episode descriptions and decide (together) which episode you’d like to try. Each episode is pretty unique and encourages you to explore the mind and body in a variety of ways — touch, pace, appreciation, anticipation, eye gazing, sensory deprivation (a blindfold) and temperature play and more.

Alongside the description of each episode, the intimacy ratings, the length of the episodes and its author, you’ll be able to read a few notable quotes taken directly from the episode and hear from our expert Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist, Kate Moyle.

In the majority of the exercises, the audio directs you both through the episode. For a few of the exercises, we encourage one partner to listen to the audio privately via headphones so that your partner can’t hear the private suggestions.

Before you begin the episode, follow the preparation steps listed here. For example, you might be asked to sit next to each other, or for one of you to be under a sheet with their clothes off. You’re also reminded to put your phone onto “Do Not Disturb” mode (but not Airplane mode, as you’ll need WiFi to stream the audio) as this is a time and space for just the 2 of you.

Next, choose the narrator. For most of the episodes, we have at least a male or female option. Who do you want to take to bed with you?

We’re then ready to start…

It might seem a bit weird at first, as the meditative music fades in and you sit hesitantly across from your partner waiting for the first instructions. But that’s normal — growth doesn’t happen by staying in your comfort zone, especially when it comes to our relationships. We are trying to make it as easy as possible for the 2 of you to be even better, together.

Depending on the episode, you might be commanded around your partner’s body or asked to answer intimate questions. Sometimes you’ll be asked to pause the episode, and other times we pace the audio appropriately for the length of time we think will work well.

Have fun, relax and be non-judgemental to the suggestions you receive. After all, it’s some random voice coming out of your phone, and they’re not going to tell you off for doing something wrong… unless you’re into that…!

As the music fades and you finish an episode, we hope you will have shared a special moment together. And if not special, at least a bit of silliness that you can laugh at!

Pillow gives you the time and opportunity to nurture one of the most important aspects of being human — to love and connect with another. We can’t wait to hear what you think.


Think you have what it takes to craft beautiful experiences for couples? Get in touch — we’re seeking a variety of writers to help couples explore the incredible diversity of human sexuality, and become our expert intimacy choreographers.